Thursday 5th July

I quote: "Jet Wolf on Oklahoma: Yawn.

Jet Wolf on Kansas: FUCKING HOT."

Our intrepid trio set out from their motel at about 10am (smuggling Jett out in the process and, it seems, without any tell-tale sourish smell left on the carpet). All thoughts of Mike and Jett spending a pleasant day with their heads out the window and the wind whipping over their lolling tongues was quickly dashed when they entered "OoooooooooOH!-Klahoma where the wind comes sweeping down-"*thud*. I'm sorry. Well that lame old gag was about the only interesting thing about passing across Oklahoma heading north, it seems.

Then came Kansas. The state had gotten itself all dolled up and ready for the passage of the Almighty Jet Wolf - by upping the degrees by just a FEW extra notches and turning Kiyone into a rather good facsimile of the Sahara desert. It is estimated she lost about five pounds in fluid just sitting and driving, as the valiant Kiyone presumably did her best with her aircon to keep her passengers cool. But it simply wasn't enough. Still...at least it meant Jett probably didn't have to 'go' as often - even a dog knows that one's inner water content is FAR too valuable in the face of a mid-July Kansas sun in the heat of the day.

And I don't care WHAT she says, I STILL wish I could be there to see all this ;). It's amazing how much more amiable Nikki can be after staring hypnotically at a road for about 5 hours ;)

One bright moment of The State of Much Corn was the passing discovery of one of America's many many roadside diversions - "Prairie Dog Town". For those of you who are cubicle workers and have not witnessed the marvel that is "Prairie Dog Town", you can get the same effect by standing up and yelling "Man, I have NEVER seen one that BIG before!" and just watch all the heads pop up around you.

Yes, Prairie Dog Town. Mike apparently ALMOST had them making a detour at Prairie Dog Town when he misread the sign as "See live rattlesnakes eat baby pigs."....until closer inspection revealed it to be 'See live rattlesnakes! PET baby pigs'. Wheeee.

Prairie Dog Town's main attraction is simple "BEHOLD THE WORLD'S LARGEST PRAIRIE DOG!!"...a little chappie who apparently weighs in at...eight THOUSAND POUNDS??. Uh. Huh. Clearly there are still an awful lot of stupid people in America whose minute intelligence is further baked by hours of nothing but corn fields as far as the eye can see. The only prairie dog THAT big would have to be the size of an SUV and be made of concrete.

Watching snakes eat baby pigs, though arguably cruel, really WOULD be more entertaining. The net result of all this ramble of Prairie Dog Town is a photo of the sign, hopefully coming to a road trip site soon :)

Nikki's plan had been to reach Fort Collins, CO by the end of day two. Of course, our minds like to screw around with our sense of scale and unfortunately, after TWELVE hours on the road, the closest they got was JUST inside the Colorado border. Which isn't a bad stretch....it's not everyday that we get the perfect photo of a sign advertising an 8000-pound prairie dog.

Once inside Colorado and its much more interesting and appropriately northerly scenery, Kiyone came to rest in Burlington. A rather disappointing little town, considering it had been marked in bold on Nikki's Triptix. By this time (10pm CST), all that was sitting in three stomachs was a handful of dry cereal, a peanut butter sandwich and some dry dog food (I'll let you work out who chose what. And careful, it may not be that obvious. Remember, Mike has an iron stomach ^_-). So it was time to find a bunk-down spot. After exiting 7 miles past Burlington to a dead-end town where people go to die every night, they returned to Burlington and tried the Comfort Inn. No vacancies. Bummer #1.

A nearby Super 8 inn was little better, being a fully closed-in hotel rather than a motel and every door sternly announced 'Sorry, No Pets'. With hotels, I'm not surprised. Just incidentally, hotels and motels that take pets other than guide dogs are pretty much non-existent around here. I've stayed at hotels where the dander and fluff left by the previous HUMANS is icky enough! After another two attempts at other places too easily-forgotten to gain a place in the long list of turf where the Almighty Jet Wolf has trod, the Burlington Inn came to the rescue. They even took pets, so they could bring Mike (boom-tish ;)). It is apparently not the GREATEST room in the world, according to Nikki's particular choice of hotel room standards, but it serves its purpose. It has the capacity to render its occupants wet, cooled from the elements and comfortably horizontal.

Mind you, at that time of night, Nikki was ready to check in at the Bates Motel if she could shower and sleep in it. She could counter any crazed knife attacker with her handy bottle of quick-stain remover. And hope it wasn't just Mike coming in to use the john.